RVP attacks Cristiano Ronaldo's liberal use of hair gel - talkSPORT Spoof

Real Madrid v Manchester United sees two of European football's most lethal attackers go head-to-head, as Cristiano Ronaldo and Robin van Persie take the field in a crunch Champions League tie.

But which player has the nicer hair? What has Steve McClaren got to do with tonight's match? And why is Ronaldo doing a Russian accent?

Check out our tongue-in-cheek video above, then leave a score prediction for the Real Madrid v Manchester United match below…